J.D.Salinger, a gifted, poetically crass American author well-known for "The Catcher in the Rye" passed away today. That was one of my favorite books I read in high school, though I could not quite put my finger on why. I think it is his honest realistic depiction of teen angst, life angst, and what may as well have been a mid-life crisis.
I think it is only apt for me to throw in a Salinger quote to start off blogging in the new year.
"What I was really hanging around for, I was trying to feel some kind of a good-by. I mean I've left schools and places I didn't even know I was leaving them. I hate that. I don't care if it's a sad good-by or a bad good-by, but when I leave a place I like to know I'm leaving it. If you don't, you feel even worse." - The Catcher in the Rye
or two....
"I don't even know what I was running for - I guess I just felt like it."
The Catcher in the Rye
The first one I like because I hate goodbyes. I just packed up my place in Minneapolis (yes, short stint indeed) and realized what I am so terrible at packing. Well, first off its because I have a short attention span and can't focus on getting done parts of a room at a time. But more importantly, I really hate goodbyes and leaving somewhere. Although Minnesota was easier to leave than most places I have lived, there were still people there I wish I didn't have to say bye to, but that's life. Leaving people behind is kind of what I've been doing for years now.
Which leads to quote number 2, a bit of a good description of the way I was feeling a few days ago. I feel slightly home-less, slightly goal-less, and therefore, slightly dream-less as of late. I want to say it will get better when I settle down, but I may not settle down for another year, if that. In a year I could be in New Orleans, NYC, Washington DC, California, or just about any other semi-warm semi-large city in the country. That kind of uncertainty is scary, because it brings me back to the way I was post-Katrina: unsure of where I'd be, where I'd be graduating from, what I planned on doing. Hopefully I'll have my feet on more solid ground in a year
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I'm so glad you're blogging again! Yeah, I liked Salinger too, that's a thoughtful way to honor him.
ReplyDeleteWe live in such an uncertain world.. but I'm glad you take risks and go for things..that's how you learn where your interests are and what makes you happy. You have a good head on your shoulders, so don't feel dejected about a setback. You have the guts to go to far away places and try new things, so where ever you do end up, it'll be the right place.
<3t